Just found this lurking in one of my old emails.
It's prolly ancient by now but it stll made me chuckle
Subject: "Drive-thru" cash point machine....
TO OUR VALUED CUSTOMERS
AIB Bank is very pleased to inform you that we are installing new
"Drive-thru" cash point machines where our customers will be able to
withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles. To enable our customers
to make full use of these new facilities, we have conducted
intensive behavioural studies to come up with appropriate procedures for
their use.
Please read the procedures that apply to you and remember them
for when you use our new machines for the first time.
PROCEDURES FOR OUR MALE CUSTOMERS:
1. Drive up to the cash machine.
2. Wind down your car window.
3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.
4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.
5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.
6. Wind up window.
7. Drive off.
PROCEDURES FOR OUR FEMALE CUSTOMERS:
1. Drive up to cash machine.
2. Reverse back the required amount to align car
window with cash machine.
3. Restart stalled engine.
4. Wind down window.
5. Find handbag, remove all contents onto passenger
seat to locate card.
6. Turn radio down.
7. Attempt to insert card into machine.
8. Open car door to allow easier access to cash
machine due to its excessive distance from car.
9. Insert card.
10. After "Invalid Card" displayed - remove "Tesco" Clubcard
and insert correct Cash Point card.
11. Remove Cash Point Card
12. Reinsert Cash Point card right way up
13. Re-enter handbag to find diary with PIN written on inside back
page..
14. Enter PIN.
15. Enter "Cancel" and re-enter correct PIN.
16. Enter amount of cash required.
17. Check make-up in rear view mirror.
18. Retrieve cash and receipt.
19. Empty handbag again to locate purse and place cash inside.
20. Place receipt in back of cheque book.
21. Re-check makeup.
22. Drive forward 2 metres.
23. Reverse back to cash machine.
24. Retrieve card.
25. Re-empty handbag, locate cardholder and place card
into slot provided.
26. Restart stalled engine and pull off.
27. Drive for 2-3 miles.
28. Release handbrake.
Enjoy lol
Soz to all the females, I'm not sexist (honest!!
)
