talkmagic.co.uk

Hello; I'm relatively new to magic. I first took it up when I was about twelve years old because it helped me pass the time away in my concrete cell and kept me on good terms with the security guards...yeah...I kinda had some issues as a kid...guess I still do in some ways, but I haven't been to jail since I was about seventeen, and now I am twenty-two, so yep, five years out of the pen, but I still got work to do towards completely turning over a new leaf; I still break the law occasionally I just don't get caught anymore hahaha. XD In all seriousness though, yes, I really do want to clean up my act; I've kicked most of the hard drugs; stopped going to parties a while back....haha, and not the kinda parties with the magicians pulling a rabbit out of a hat; different kinda partying. Currently been focusing more on finding inner peace and/or spiritual enlightenment; grounding and centering myself. I've had a bit of an anger problem these past few years...not really the explosive kind, but the quiet kind; the kind that festers deep inside....I was planning on doing some seriously not-so-nice things to some not-so-nice people, and it probably would have got me the death penalty, or otherwise ruined my life some other way.

These days I'm optimistic that re-discovering my passion for magic and illusion can help me overcome my personal demons as well as distract my mind from....darkness. I'm particularly interested in Escapology, (I got into that after busting out of my first locked-down facility haha; getting out of that horrific place was the most exhilarating moment of my life; my heart has never before pounded so hard in my chest before.) I'm also interested in some of the more daredevil style of magic, such as walking on fire and broken glass, being buried alive, impaled, or blown up....I guess I'm a bit of a masochist haha; I just want to feel alive again....but without breaking the law or frying my brain cells.

Since I've been back on "the Outside" as we called it, I've been a stock boy at an auto parts store; a dog-sitter at a local kennel, a secretary for a freight company, a wildland firefighter, and a ranch hand. I've either quit/stormed off, or been fired from every single position. ...I'm not really a people person, and I'm easily bored. Firefighting was the only thing I really loved to do, but I got busted with drugs and alcohol in my tent on Federal land; almost ended up in prison for 5 years because of it, but fortunately I'd been fighting fires long enough that the park ranger and my bosses decided to agree on just keeping it at the fire-level. I'm a good guy and a hard worker...I've just made a lot of mistakes and bad choices. I've been out of work for a while; been pretty depressed; decided that something's gotta give and I gotta start thinking about starting a real a career and getting a friggin' life. I know my pattern though when it comes to working a traditional 9-5 job; eventually someone's going to do something just a little bit too stupid and I'm gonna end up cussing them out or chucking something across the room; I do better in short bursts; sticking me in a room or cubicle for eight hours straight without anything fun to do is just gonna drive me nuts every single time; figured I need to pick a career that I'd actually enjoy and have a fun time doing. Sooo yep.....Magic.

--Hamelden

Hi, welcome to TM!

Thanks; happy to be here.

welcome to TM, enjoy your time here.
Thanks for your honesty, don't think anybody else would have have dared to mentioned what you said about your time in HM pleasure.
Thanks Garry.

Haha; thanks. I've had yeeears of psychotherapy though; being open and honest about myself kinda became a habit; pretty easy for me to talk to people. Wasn't always like that though; I'm still fairly shy and prefer to stick to myself, but magic seems like it could be a good way to start coming out of my shell a bit more and start being more social. Feels kinda hard for me to relate with other human beings at times; most little boys grew up playing with tonka trucks...other little boys grew up in captivity being tortured every other day haha. Way I see it, one cannot live a full life on Planet Earth without getting traumatized at some point along the way hahaha. XD

PS: What's HM Pleasure? o.O

Hiya and welcome along to TM

It really sounds like you've been through some troubled times but are trying to turn things around, good luck to you, it can't be an easy thing to do

'HM Pleasure', I'm guessing you're not from the UK? Staying at Her Majesty's Pleasure is British slang for prison.

Thank you for the warm welcomes!

Oh! Haha, that's what HM Pleasure means. XD Thanks for educating me! Indeed you surmise correctly; I hail from the United States of America; within the State of Alaska. Here in Alaska, we tend to refer to the rest of the country as "The Lower 48" (not including Hawaii); and the Lower 48 just barely recognizes us as part of their world; they just care about our resources haha.