BaBaBoom wrote:please please realise this is a joke, unless you like spikey hair and stammers

Are you referring to that guy who got famous from Pop Idol???
MOM... the D'lite is an easily serviceable item, if you've got the right tools. But being fair, the cost of the Aardvark is about £2 to £3, and you'll need some other items to complete the mission too.
At around £10 each, and no more hassle than waiting for the postie to arrive, you get a nice fresh D'lite - and your old ones can be dismantled and used as nice soft Lemons - great for when you need to handle cards too.
I HAVE repaired my D'lites once, but it was nothing more than re-attaching the Aardvark and it's connected Ferret to the inside of the Lemon.
Know what I mean??? This was very easy, but made me realise how much of a gruel it would be to replace the aardvark itself...