talkmagic.co.uk

Farlsborough wrote:The only one I've got is "you look an awful lot like my next girlfriend..."

or for putting a guy down "i used to know a guy who looked a lot like you... yeah, he was gay too... we don't talk anymore"

OK.

So a lot of people here are aPUA's

I have kidney stones, and I was wondering whether you could suck them out for me.

Heyyy baby.. If you play dead, I’ll play necrophile.

Gee! You don’t sweat much for a big-ole fat girl!

Get ya coat love, you've pulled!


Here's 20p, "why?", so you can ring ya flatmates and tell them you won't be home tonight!


(for the yummy mummies)
Hello mother, want another?


Nice dress, it'd look great crumpled on my bedroom floor!


How'd you like your eggs? Fried, poached, boiled or FERTILISED!!



If I said you had a great body would you hold it against me!!


BOOM BOOM!! LoL

MattVonFat wrote:"Are you free tonight? Or do I have to pay?"

lmao

how about "How ya doing" with a big grinn on your face. I got that from friends
or how about
I got a new magic effect to show you however, it involves us getting freaky in the truck. Do ya want to join.
another one

I may not be Fred Flintstone, but I bet I can make your bed rock.

Yo Baby, you be my Dairy Queen, I'll be your Burger King, you treat me right, and I'll do it your way.

He : Hey Baby ... Wanna dance? She : No. He : Oh, C'mon! Lower you're standards a little. I did...

I lost my phone number. Can I borrow yours?
What is a slutty girl like you doing in a classy place like this? OOPS! I mean, what is nice girl like you doing in a dump like this? (Phew)

Baby, you're so sweet, you put Hershey's outta business.

Wow! Are those real?

If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put U and I together!

I know milk does a body good, but damn girl, how much have you been drinking?

Excuse me, miss, do you give head to strangers? No. Well, then, allow me to introduce myself.

You remind me of my Grandma except I haven't slept with you yet.

Save a horse -- ride a cowboy.

You look like a hooker I knew in Fresno.

No, I'm not a cop. What can I get for fifty bucks?

Picture this, you, me, bubble baths, and a bottle of champagne.

So sorry to bother you -- someone at this address called for the man of her dreams, but you look way hotter than the girl I was supposed to be delivered to.

As she's leaving....Hey aren't you forgetting something? She: What? Me!

Do you know karate? 'Cause your body is really kickin.

LMAO at some of these

Here's another one, that I've never actually tried out myself (for obvious reasons ) :

"Hey, do u wanna play strip poker? You strip, I'll poke ya."

one of my favorite is go up to a chick and act like you know them. It goes over very swell. sometimes there like what the hell just happened.

Lawrence wrote:the cheeky one is the sidle up to a girl at the bar as she's ordering and say "and a pint of lager too please" on top of whatever she ordered. now, she'll either think you're cute and buy you a drink, but if she gets offended and says she's not buying it, offer to pay for the round. ba zing!

or, just sidle (i like to sidle in clubs, it moves the crowds quicker) up to someone, say hello, introduce yourself and ask how they are; do it loudly and with a lot of enthusiasm, while simultaneously stealing the drink out of their hand, as they reply, start to drink. i do this to my friends at our local rock club (usually only works the first time), and i've had one guy take his drink straight back, a few others wonder how i managed to be drinking their drink (a minute or 2 into the conversation), but most of all, they just don't realise. brilliance.
now, i realise this isn't very chatty uppy, but i thought i'd throw it in their. i don't do the chatting up thing

Tried this the other night! Did it to a mate who didnt notice, but i felt guilty so i gave it him back and he looked confused as to how i managed to get his drink.

I then did it to a guy i hadnt seen in years (i was slightly the worse for wear) and then shook the hand that i took his pint out of and walked off. Nice one Ecko!

Ah, how could we forget the pure filth of... (censored for kiddie-vision...)

"What's got two thumbs and loves b***-j**s?" (wait for a second, then point thumbs at self...)

Q: How much does a Walrus weigh?

I dont know...

A: I dont know either, but is it enough to break the ice?


For the math crowd...

I wish I was a derivative so I could lie tangent to your curves.

johntheblob wrote:For the math crowd...

I wish I was a derivative so I could lie tangent to your curves.

it worries me that i find this kind of thing funny.

i actually giggled out loud at a lecture writing "for t>39" on the board, oh dear! :: oh dear ::
and i laugh everytime someone starts something with "part a"
PART A!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

One of the best pickuplines I heard recently, was from the Man Show. They got the 12 year old Man Show Boy to go out and try pickuplines:

Hey lady! Wanna help me out with my sex education show and tell?
No? Darn, I thought you were a lezbo...

My two favorite are:

"If I were you and you were me, You'd be Nick and I'd be sexy."
and
"Excuse me, is your father a thief? Because my television is missing."

Lawrence wrote:i actually giggled out loud at a lecture writing "for t>39" on the board

You're going to have to explain that one...

Lawrence wrote:and i laugh everytime someone starts something with "part a"
PART A!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Me too...!