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someone did that to me once and they told me loads of stuff which they'd just got off other forums lol!

Sorry i cannot resist any longer...Must make bad joke.

I must warn you all i have a Police record.....Message in a Bottle

Any chance of having James Blunt arrested for crimes against music!

Blimey! I don't know old Flashy goes away for a few days and suddenly the gaff is crawling with rossers! Lucky I've spent the last few days in a secret Welsh hideaway working out how to pick the lock of a pair of ex police handcuffs isn't it? Hah! now all I have to do is work out some cunning mastercrime...

er... you do still use Hiatts 1960's cuffs don't you?

Anyway welcome aboard old bean! By the way if you want to ask me anything just talk to my lawyer.. Mandrake QC.

They have found out Mandrake's secret identity as an international Crime Lord

ssshhh... loose lips sink ships old man... mums the word!

Flash wrote:if you want to ask me anything just talk to my lawyer.. Mandrake QC.

(Mandrake smooths down his legal robes, adjusts his wig to a disturbingly sexy angle, clears his throat and, as an expectant hush falls over the court, rises to make his opening statement)

M'lud, alright already, and members of the jury, may it please the court (tuff if it doesn't), my client wishes to reserve his defence, the right the remain silent (that'll be the day!) and possibly the first two weeks in August for his holidays. If that doesn’t work we'll go for an insanity plea. Me as well as Flashy.

Mandrake ICL, QC (International Crime Lord and Quite Crackers )

Hi there little Miss E and welcome

Flash wrote::shock:

Lucky I've spent the last few days in a secret Welsh hideaway working out how to pick the lock of a pair of ex police handcuffs isn't it? Hah! now all I have to do is work out some cunning mastercrime...

er... you do still use Hiatts 1960's cuffs don't you?

Hiatts 1960's? nah! try rigid cuffs, fool, cough, i mean magician proof! i can show you how though ....lol!

i quite fancy a secret welsh hideaway lol...

little miss erdnase wrote: Hiatts 1960's? nah! try rigid cuffs, fool, cough, i mean magician proof! i can show you how though ....lol!

i quite fancy a secret welsh hideaway lol...

No tempting as it sounds (steady now Flashy) I'm not falling for that old ploy, once you have old Flash cuffed it'll be off to the cells in double quick time and I'll be on a diet of bread and water before I've had a chance to say "Dixon of Dock Green"!!

No as the gaff appears to be blown, the jig is obviously up (steady Flashy) and you seem to be on to me and my brilliant masterplan I'm going to have to instigate escape plan B:

Mandrake you take the first flight to Rio De Janeiro go to the house of the fallen conjurer and ask for El Magico, he'll sort you out with fake papers and enough cigars to buy yourself a mansion deep in the Brazillian jungle...
Dat & Tomo, you take the Jag to the Houdini lads and get them to dispose of it in the drink, then using the private Leer jet, cut across to the Costa Del Sol where Bananafish & Tom "Moriarty" Lauten will tell you next stage...
Travelling under the pseudoname of the Amazing Sombrero, you Magicdiscoman, will head over the Mexican Border, travel to the small and ancient stone church of the Sacred Bongo. Inside the leg of the third pew from the alter, you'll find a wad of notes and all the tortilla chips you can carry.

After the heat has died down (say twenty years or so) use the secret tunnels and meet me in the Dove's Head....

What about me! i ain't taking the rap for no one

Remember i have the pictures of Mandrake, the kebab and the donkey

Ah StephenMagic... Don't worry I haven't forgotton about you, you will be well taken care of... Go to the back of The Mentalists Only area where you will see a shiney black Harley Davidson and a red ferrari... Leave them where they are (Craig Browning and Roth need to get away too) and take the Sinclair C5 to Bognor Regis where you need to go to the Sunny Zimmer B&B and check yourself in under the pseudoname of Mr T. Cooper. When the time is right Sexton Blake will contact you, until then remember your cover story: You are a used Fez salesman who is in Bognor for a hat convention, you have never heard anything about a masterplan or Mandrake...

OK! remember the red haddock flies at down I will return the pictures

i know an old mercenary In Brazil if you get that far. Give him the secret password of CUPS and he will give all you need

If Mandrake needs more men when it cools down, contact me, i pledge my loyalty

each remember to take the key to the basement and take a portion of the basement archives less they fall into the hands of the rozzers.
wee'll need that stuff to live on after madame shirley has done the face reconstructions, unfortunately shes only good at wombles but that should not be a problem.

if all else fails head for the secret garden passed the laughing gargoil painting in the basement not even a half elven magical police lady can pass though gates and her locks of fortitude cannot contain us, so see you guys by the pond for a margarita.

I have the secret recipe for magic C.U.P.S. cake. We can live on these while on the road .

Newbies will think we are mad

Dammit what are Mr T. Cooper and the Amazing Sombrero still doing here? She'll be back soon and then we'll all be scuppered... don't delay in escaping or I'll have to send our feared hitman, Seige, to pay you both a little visit, then you'll really find out whats up his sleeve...

And the newbies can think what they like, I know I'm as sane as a fish, and if you don't believe me just ask him...