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I did a gig at a Rugby Club recently. Well, with that many blokes, all built like brick s***houses, it was intimidating.
It was worse, as they were all very drunk, celebrating the cup they had just won, which stood proudly on display on the table I was to use.

Well, the first thing that went wrong, was a HotShot cut, which somehow ended up with me flicking the card into someones eye. It scratched the surface, so someone took him to hospital.

Next, I tried the burnt and restored napkin in a TT. I must have picked up some flash paper by mistake. When I asked one of them to blow on it when I lit it, whoosh, his shirt caught fire, giving him serious burns. Volounteer, or should that be victim, number two, down to the hospital.

Now comes the scary part. I had a very upset bunch of rugby players, but I decided to redeem myself. So I tried a levitation, but hadn't seen the drink spilled on a polished floor. I flew backwards, crushing something underneath me as I fell. With horror, I knew I had flattened the Trophey they had just won. They started advancing on me, backing me into a corner. I looked up, saw a skylight above the table, so made a run for it. I ran and jumped onto the table, managing to stand on the trophy, managing to snap a handle from it, while finishing it of into a flat scrap of metal. I did manage to grab hold of the skylight, pushing it open and scrambling up. I was almost out, when I felt hands underneath me, pulling my leg.


When was the last time you had your leg pulled?

very good Darrel

excelent.... you had me up until the flash paper bit, no one could be that unlucky! (I hope!)