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Im searcing for some good jokes to use in between acts at my cabaret shows, any suggestions?

i want to be able to use these instead of moving straight onto the next effect

any suggestions, not only for jokes but what else can be a good idea to use?


Jags

jagsmagic wrote:Im searcing for some good jokes to use in between acts at my cabaret shows, any suggestions?

i want to be able to use these instead of moving straight onto the next effect

any suggestions, not only for jokes but what else can be a good idea to use?


Jags

A friend of mine has a small child and next door has a BIG dog that keeps getting over the fence and barks at the kid. My friend lost his rag and went round to the neighbour and told him that if he didn't control the animal he'd poison it, becasue he's a bit mad, my mate. Anyway, the guy next door let it happen again, so my friend got some fresh steak, cooked it, made a nice gravy and put loads of petrol in it. Then he left it out for dog features to jump over the fence, devour it and die horribly. The dog wolfed it down, and within minutes started staggering about before running about like mad, barking its head off and generally acting completely crazy. Then it stopped. Just completely stopped dead and stood there like a statue. Do you know why?

Was it dead, asks the table, concerned at your friend's inhumanity to dumb animals.

No. It ran out of petrol!

lol thats cool i like it

keep them coming, altho im not sure how that would fit in my act lol

or............. "the dog ran out of petrol", now for the next act please welcome my assistant the dog...lol


Jags

Then you could do an effect where you stick the petrol pump up the dogs.....

I think that might be a bit to rude

lol, i suppose i could then wave my magic wand and make the dog change colour


Jags

I'm sure the dog would go bright red if you did that

LOL LOL LOL


Jags

lmao at Kev ... excelent.

Rob

Linking the patter of two effects can be a good one.

Not only does it kill time, but it makes sense of the ordering of the show.

Also... consider miniature biographies. e.g. if your show was ordered such:

1. Sponge balls
2. Vanishing silk
3. Ambitious card
4. Crazy mans handcuffs

then how about:

"The first trick I ever learned was off my grandpa. He used to play for hours with these sponge balls"...

1 - Sponge balls

"I soon started experimenting with what my grandpa taught me, and one day I frightened him senseless by making his hanky disappear before his eyes! Made his sponge ball trick look like Playschool!"

2 - vanishing silk

"Once I was older and wiser, I started playing around with cards. This was a revelation for me, because my family and friends were getting bored of spongeballs and losing their hankies! One of the earliest tricks I saw, and one that sticks in my head, was where a guy was taking a card which he SAID was lighter than the other cards in the deck, and therefore always rose to the top..."

3 - ambitious card

"By the time I got my first job, I'd really sort of left magic behind a bit. Carrying a deck of cards round became a chore, especially with no pockets (my first job was swimming pool attendant!). But one thing I used to do—which many of you also probably did—was wear elastic bands round my wrist! Dont' know why! One day, someone was nosey enough to ask "why do you wear elastic bands around your wrist?". Well, rather than say "I don't know" I proceeded to explain..."

4 - crazy man's handcuffs

????

As long as the 'linking stories' are almost credible, and are amusing, they could fit right in.

My own performances are usually ad-lib, but I use a similar approach and get a good laugh out of it! It's an ice breaker too.

SirRawlins wrote:lmao at Kev ... excelent.

Rob

Thanks

And thanks for the good ideas of linking effects as well seige, I'm sure I will be able to add them to my performances

Seige

i very much like that story concept, not only will it link the effects together. It would also take you that extra bit time longer on the tables etc

thanks


Jags

The whole idea behind this patter was purely accident, brought on by nerves. It's just something I've always seemed to do, regardless of planning it.

And yeah, it really DOES pad out an act. You can really elaborate on the links, and so long as there is relevance rather than 'just talking for the sake of it' then it seems to go down well.

It suits my personality, cos I am just naturally verbose, but I also find that it takes away some of the barriers between me and the audience (be it family, friends or strangers).

It also fits with the fact that my routines are very much patter/story based. Anyone who's been on the forum for a while will vouch for that. I find it works well for me, because I really get into the role of storyteller as well.

Hope it helps someone!

Well it will surely help me,

What i normally do is get on with it without a story linking the magic together

But i like this idea and will prepare something similar and try it out

thanks

would you use the same concept for stage magic or cabaret? (obvisouly it'll depend on what illusions i'll use)

Is there a book or site available where i can find good magic type jokes

Its like Lance burton did a quick type joke before he made ali landrey levitate.. He said...... 'when doing magic magicians always get asked questions, like, men always ask if you can make our wives disappear, women always ask can you makes us float, now there is one we can work on'

get my drift?


Jags

You need to get yourself a bunch of tapes/DVD's jags ... ones with a comic based approach ... anything by Tommy Cooper would be a good start, the man is hilarious.

Other than that i have recently watched Bill Malone's "On the Loose" series and Daryl's "Fooler Dooler" series ... both had me giggling like a school girl

I've not seen this sort of thing documented in books, i think it will probably just come with exerience, just watch plenty of material and you will develope your own idea ... but for gods sake DONT watch any Barry and Stuart

Rob

SirRawlins wrote:the man is hilarious.

One man's meat is another man's poison...

I found him unfunny and tedious when I watched the special on TV...maybe it was just a bad day though.

Kati