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hey peeps me again, here is me performing torn, im not to confident performing it yet so any pointers? or comments good of bad?

oh and regarding the patter, it was litrally off the top of my head so i know it seems a bit like im babbling on.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eC8L4WJ8qT0

just noticed how many times i say "and" sorry about that like i said patter was off the top of my head.

Not bad, sir. Not bad at all. You're not nearly as far off as you might think. Just a few things I noticed.

In what appears to be a way to seem more fair and open with the card - you tend to move your hands a bit too much between phases of the restoration. Bear in mind that this can have an adverse affect on your spectator. A few times, your movements caused a few flashes. Nothing detrimental to the overall routine, but it's something to watch out for. Daniel's thinking behind this effect is very solid - and it has a logical progression. You don't need to over-convince here. The restorations are so open, you don't need to help them.

Work on relaxing your dirty hand. Your fingers are clamped together rather tightly. The looseness and casual nature will come with practice - so just keep at it, and this will come to you.

The only other critique I can really offer is that you block view of the card at a few points in the routine. This can draw suspicion - which you don't want. Again, this is fixed through practice and performance.

For now, you need to make a concerted effort to ensure that the card is not blocked from view, and that your motions and actions are smooth and fluid. Focus on the moves and handling - pay close attention to everything you're doing. Part of the problem with presentation is that your patter isn't ready. As you said yourself, it came off the top of your head. As a result, the "umms" and "ands" force your mind to think about what to SAY - distracting you from what you're doing. My biggest piece of advice, for now, would be to drop the patter completely. Master the technical aspects of the effect. Get the handling and routine down. Trying to capture both at the same time will lead to inconsistencies in both aspects. Once you have the handling down - THEN make it your own. Give it the story line (which has a nice feel to it - and should be expanded upon, I think) you want and make the presentation your own.

Hope that helps.