When I was at college I sat next to this chap called Craig (yes, I attended lessons occasionally enough to know my classmates names!) and he was a bit of an NLP nut.
We'd go to the resource centre to work on a psychology assignment and he used to get this book on NLP out and read through it with tuts, laughs and general "oh my" faces.
He showed me a few things in his book and being young and impressionable it seemed sensible enough to me.
Of course, time went by, I stopped going to college and looked at NLP in the real world to find it didn't match this perfect model that was supposedly laid out.
Live and learn I guess.
Farlsborough wrote:As far as I can fathom it, the secret to NLP is this: doing what people with good social skills do anyway. There are all sorts of technical names for perfectly natural "phenomenon", I just think it's a bit of a smokescreen so people can sell you books that tell you if you remember to make eye contact and smile people will like you.
That's a very minimalistic view of NLP but to all extents and purposes seems to be correct.
I think the idea behind the older generation of NLP was that it was to exaggerate this idea and use a few more ideas which had come about through "real world" experience (as an interesting aside, someone once told me that NLP considers all generalisations to be false and have named them
ePrime. Some of the later NLP books are apparently written completely without
ePrime).
After all, the word rapport is almost synonymous with NLP these days.
So yes, it is about doing what people with good social skills do naturally, but exaggerated enough to have a noteable effect without being overpowering.
...which is perfectly true, only I don't need a bedroom scholar to tell me that, and take the opportunity to introduce a load of jargon at the same time. Of course, if he was a bit of an introvert loner which - let's face it - a fair few amateur magicians and mentalists are, it probably did revolutionise their interpersonal interactions, but only by bringing them up to speed as it were.
Some quite socially adept people could probably use a few ideas from NLP and get something from it - as long as they don't go too far and start getting into the silly "NLP is a masterful tool to make you the master of all" attitude.
Did anyone see what was probably the most recent "Come Dine With Me"? The one with the slightly... ahem... dwarfish guy, the two ladies and the young man? Well, I know the young man. Used to be very good friends with him, he serves at my local in Sheffield. He's got himself into an NLP business which in terms of general prosperity I wish him all the luck in the world with, but that's why he was so confident to the point of sounding arrogant in the beginning - he thought with his nifty NLP stuff he could simply blow everyone else out of the water.
And therein lies the problem. NLP, if believed and used at all should be used to enhance your natural charisma and charm - not instead of it.
Unfortunately a lot of the later stuff is all about
replacing natural social skills with NLP and doesn't work.
(When I worked in the kitchen at Tesco a delivery driver came in one night and asked if he could use my coffee machine card. He had an NLP book on him which he sat down and started reading and when I asked him about it he seemed very smug and said "Yes, I used NLP when I asked you if I could borrow your card". Errr... what? Smiling and asking politely? Hmmm. Maybe NLP is taking itself a bit TOO seriously.)
So yeah... NLP... harumph. In my humble opinion. An interesting jumper for mentalism effects to avoid the passe realms of spirits and mediums, which becomes more of an annoyance when clever showmen like Derren Brown manage to convince magicians and mentalists who really should know better that "the one with the bag and the coloured stones" was all done through NLP, and not that one wot's off the Max Maven DVD

Hmm, Derren never claimed to use NLP to acheive his nefarious ends, but an interesting point.
If we can dress things up as pure psychology, or as psychic evidence or spirit manifestations etc, why not use NLP? After all, it will be no different than the lie we tell about guessing who got the black ball by studying psychology and a persons tiny subconscious responses.
Would be interesting to see if a mentalist could crash an NLP
(an NLP? a NLP? An sounds better but a is more grammatically correct. Bah!) seminar and ply his trade there and see if he could get away with claiming NLP.
Would the practicioners believe this? And would they suggest that the mentalist was a person with an excellent grasp of NLP?
Derren Brown - we have stumbled across your new special!
£10k for the idea thanks!

You wont find much better anywhere and it's nothing - a rigmarole with a few bits of paper and lots of spiel. That is Mentalism
Tony Corinda