Taken from a magic group on facebook:
Item descriptions from sellers - what they say and what they really mean:
2 minute fix needed >>>>>> "Impossible to fix so selling as is."
Slightly used >>>>>> "Battered"
New and Unused >>>>>> "c*** (not the best)!"
No Instructions >>>>>> "Bought at an auction."
No instructions, but easy to figure out >>>>>> "Not a bloody clue how it works."
Easy to do - >>>>>> "Double backer."
Hilarious routine >>>>>> "c*** (not the best) effect."
Phenomenal effect >>>>>> "Boring routine."
You can get 10 minutes out of this >>>>>> "You'll never be booked by the same person twice."
Postage and packing included >>>>>> "I'm desperate to get rid of it."
Offers >>>>>> "I don't know how much to ask but will get pi**ed if you offer me less than I actually think I want.."
Will trade >>>>>> "I'm addicted to owning c*** (not the best)... I'm a magic hoarder who needs help.... you should see my house, it's packed to the rafters."
Highly collectible Supreme item >>>>>> "Silk screened c*** (not the best)."
Refills easily available >>>>>> "Refills are expensive."
Still sealed >>>>>> "Drunken convention purchase."
Needs re-banding >>>>>> "I'm lazy - bands have perished, it'll take 4 days and 3 gallons of aceatone to fix."
Completely new method >>>>>> "I read it in an old obscure book and I'm hoping nobody else has read it."
Received rave reviews >>>>>> "I sent out frrebies to friends in exchange for glowing reviews."
Hss been regularly used in my shows for the past three years >>>>>> "I came up with the idea recently and need to look as if its a worker."
I'm a full-time working pro, but this just isn't for me >>>>>> "My mum told me to sell it, because she won't pay for the new xbox game I'm wanting."
A bargain >>>>>> "Bloody expensive and the wife has just found out how much it costs, so need to get as much of the money back and quick."
Ideal for the creative magician >>>>>> "There are no instructions and I don't know what to do with it".
A miracle in the right hand >>>>>> "I am left handed".
Durable >>>>>> "Laminated".
Packs flat >>>>>> "If you sit on it".
Packs flat and plays big >>>>>> "made out of cardboard with schoolboy artwork".
Selling this one, as I have a back up >>>>>> No I haven't. I bought it 'cos everyone else did, and I didnt want to feel left out, but now everyone else is selling their's ... well ... ME TOO".
A steal at this price >>>>>> "Bloody expensive but I hope no one realises'.
Finally got round to sorting out my magic boxes >>>>>> "The wife discovered where all our spare cash was going".
Extremely Rare Item !! >>>>>> "I've Googled it, and even the Internet has never bloody heard of it, so I'm hoping it's valuable and not just old and c*** (not the best)".
Signed by the author >>>>>> "Scribbled in by someone you've never heard of".
Only opened to look >>>>>> "Opened it, played with it, broke it and now I'm hoping no one notices".
Unique Item >>>>>> "Mass produced, over-priced c*** (not the best)".
Made by Master Craftsmen >>>>>> "Made in China".
Undetectable gimmick >>>>>> "It's a piece of thread".
Made me laugh
Feel free to add your own ........
all very true
