talkmagic.co.uk

Since spending last week in London, I now can't stand tourists.

When the little man is on green, don't stand staring at the traffic that's waiting for you to cross the road safely, don't stop for a conversation on the stairs at a busy Tube station during rush hour, and please don't think queueing for the ticket machines is something only others do. Oh, and try zipping the pockets on your backpacks.

Witless meanderthals (geddit?).

ooooooooooooh backpacks! i hate them, and their wearers with a passion...

yes, I'm sure it does carry a lot of stuff that you don't really need, but at the same time - do you really have to wear it when on a busy tube? swinging the 'pack to and fro as you witter on about finding yourself in Thailand cos of the beautiful sunsets?

No. Take them off and stand there like a good idiot, with the 'pack between your ironic sandals. Makes everywhere more spacious and less irritating y'see. Second only to baning all backpackers.

People who stop at the top of escalators for a jolly nice look round; oblivious to the rest of the world. "OOOhhh! Bright lights! Metal objects! Floors that move! Let's stand here like sh*ts and stare...."

What else? People who want to constantly move from bar to bar. Why?! I was comfy where i was - you're going to get the same thing elsewhere. People and booze. Only the toilets alter. Stop wasting my time, and more importantly don't you dare make me lose my all important comfortable seat. Nothing worse than standing whilst drunk.

Oh and people who don't understand what an innuendo is, and post things in that thread that are clearly not innuendos...go look up the word and get back to us all will you?

Loud, "look at me!" types. No, there's NOT enough room on this planet for everyone. Eject them into space quick smart. Plenty of room for them up there. If you want attention, be or say something interesting, do not raise your voice, shout, or fake laugh your way through life.

Hell.is.other.people.

I'd love to be the Omega man. I'd walk around Tesco's naked.

Another thing that really gets me is people who say everything as a question? As If they're gently scoping out how stupid I am? As if they've been on a course to find out how much help I need to understand basic concepts without insulting me, but by doing so come across as insulting my intelligence because they're actually really stupid themselves? I like to imagine their tiny brains rattling about in their heads like King Kong throwing a bus through a coin factory.

And people who help sell junk food for McDonalds without working there or getting any money for doing so. They're loving it, apparently, the present progressive gonks.

Can you tell I read Charlie Brooker in today's Guardian?

What drives me absolutely mad is when someone like a plumber has put their business name in mirror-writing on the bonnet of their van.

The only reason fire engines and ambulances do this is to get the message across specifically to the car in front that is blocking them rushing to an emergency. The driver looks in their rear view mirror and can see FIRE or AMBULANCE staring them in the face, thanks to the mirror writing, and hopefully they pull over quickly.

However this doesn't apply to a plumber! The writing on their van should be advertising their business name to everyone around - not just one car at a time! It's so stupid it makes me mad!!!

TheStoner wrote:However this doesn't apply to a plumber! The writing on their van should be advertising their business name to everyone around - not just one car at a time! It's so stupid it makes me mad!!!

In that case can we stop them from using Balloon too?

To all sign makers who use that font: stop it. Just stop it.

madvillainy wrote:Has anyone ever pointed out that gravity is a law, not a theory?

If they did point it out quite quickly someone else would point out, "The law is HOW it works the theory is WHY it works."

On a completely unrelated note:

I dislike dairy products or rather I dislike not being able to HAVE dairy products. food allergy suck and perhaps if you had it your whole life it would still be upsetting because you'd always "want to know"

It is far worse to have grown up on the stuff and suddenly have it cleft from your pallet with a pitch fork.

la sigh.

Tomo wrote:Since spending last week in London, I now can't stand tourists.

When the little man is on green, don't stand staring at the traffic that's waiting for you to cross the road safely, don't stop for a conversation on the stairs at a busy Tube station during rush hour, and please don't think queueing for the ticket machines is something only others do. Oh, and try zipping the pockets on your backpacks.

Witless meanderthals (geddit?).

I live in a small town that constantly gets loaded with tourists. Not only do they clog up the roads with their 5 MPH driving, they also have to drive in the neighborhoods like they are sight seeing. Look, I think Sight seeing is fine and dandy... When you do it in places that are made for it. IE: Yosemite or some camp ground. Not neighborhoods. It just gets annoying when people do that. This happens a lot during the summer and winter months. "OH look henry, a TREE! Oh Look. GRASS!" Move out of the way, some of us have jobs to get to.

This where portal guns ala the game Portal would come in very handy. Some old lady and her husband are causing traffic to be backed due to their dumbness.. You simply shoot the car and teleport them to some far away place. Problem solved..

Another for me is those churches with the signs up front that have crazy messages every other day!

My personal favorite that I've seen lately has been:

"There's no "Chilling Out", in the FIRES OF HELL!"

I saw a poster once that had a bunch of skater kids hanging out with Jesus. Not even Photoshopped, a real photo of some guy dressed as Jesus hanging out with a bunch of lads. The thing is, none of them were smiling. It seemed rather a solemn affair.

I love churches that try and be "hip".

I got all excited when I read not even photo shopped thinking that Jesus came to hang out with some skaters but... I guess not.

The churches here are weird at advertising too.
One has up until recently displayed a large billboard saying "Google doesn't have all the answers" (To which I mentally answer "Of course not. I go to Wikipedia...")
Another has the less insulting to Dot Com Companies "Death Couldn't Take Him, The Grave Couldn't Hold Him" (To which I mentally answer "Who, Chuck Norris?")

My annoyance - Final wisdom teeth coming through. I wouldn't mind the toothache, but it only happens when I want to go to sleep, and I can't talk properly in work with only 4 broken hours of rest...

Here's one: Parents of children who come to my ward being aggressive without having a frickin' clue how the whole process of medicine works, what needs to happen or any knowledge about drugs. But, y'know, they got walked over once in their lives, so now they're going to call the shots because that's how you get what you want, right...?

Let me just clarify: I have no problem with people wanting to be kept informed, and make positive decisions about their care or that of their children. But when people are just ar5ey because they think it'll keep us on our toes or something... grrr...

Dr. F, if it makes you feel any better, my sister qualified as a doctor recently and she was complaining about a very similar thing the other day. People are just cocks.

That's you should act like Dr. House or Dr. Cox towards them. I mean yeah, you may not have tenure, but you can still look at somebody and say "Look, Lady. I went through (insert number of years) in medical school. So I KNOW what the hell I am talking about. You However, do not know what the hell you are talking about. So please do keep your pie hole shut."